rough

ive been thinking. for some reason, its like wen things are goin fine... sumthn in me forces me to eff it up and be angry/annoyed/bitchy and the like. its happened thurs, fri and today. its killin me. this type of behavior always seems to strain my relationships. i dont know how to stop. its like i know things arent that serious but im compelled to make them more than they are. i have a problem. lady gaga had it right "u got me wonderin why i.. i like it rough" even tho shes talking about sex. im pretty sure. maybe some other stuff too but thats beside my point.

if only i could force myself to be happy instead or atleast just ok. im gonna go cry angry tears. argh.

untitled document.

i bought a memory foam pad thing for my bed. it smells awful. its fluffing up at the moment. i just wanna lay on it already. argh!! im impatient. and i have to go to a couple museums today. I DONT WANNA! i feel like a little kid whining but i hate going on field trips now. maybe if i didnt have to go solo it would be cooler but.. i have to strike out on my own. and i have to take a picture next to a picture or sumthn of the like. i cant really remember.

in other news, my neck hurts. and i have lady gagas cd. its cool and old school poppy/glam. i should prob put it on my ipod so i have sum new ish to listen to on the metro ride and wandering thru DC.

trevors goin home tonight. today blows major penis.

:(

ok. im audi 5000. word to ya momz.

sometimes i miss things

this time im missin short hair. ive been doin all i can since 07 to grow my hair back to its former glory, but from time to time i get that sudden urge to chop it again. its a sickness i tell u. im addicted to the hair on the floor. i wish my hair was like asian hair. asian hair grows the fastest. i think i saw that on like guinness records as a quick tidbit. i dont know. i might have just made that up, but i def heard/saw/read it somewhere in my past. my hair grows at a decent rate but i want sum "i need to cut my hair cuz it grew back after a month" type hair.

guess i will be fighting my craving. i feel like a fat person on a diet trying to resist mickey d's [which is across the street btw]. really tuff. :sigh: maybe i will calm this urge by doing something else reckless.. like another tattoo! i like being reckless that way and ornamenting my body (since ive learned the diff between ornaments an decorations in my art theory bs class -- an i will not be merely decorated!). i will probably get something love related since love is major in my life. especially since im currently swirling down the drain of IN LOVE w/ trev. and i most def cannot swim.

i think imma get "folie à deux" with hearts and random swirly twirly lines. ive posted that phrase before. for refreshers tho, it means "madness shared by two", in actuality its like a technical term for a mental disorder, but im pretty sure being in love is a mental disorder; pure madness. or atleast thats my spin on the
thing. i ❤ love tho. its super coolio and all.

well i think ive jumped subjects enuff for just one post. my next jump is gonna be into the shower cuz i have class in like an hour. oh joy. making a sculpture. hope it comes out like i hope. if not then.. maybe i will cheer myself up with a hair cut. sike! :)

-- R.I.P. Cypher > best snake ever.

red is my favorite.

today is kinda cold. im not feelin it. im currently perched close in front of my fireplace/spaceheater. theres a crane moving outside my window, but strangely no noise. the construction round here has gotten calmer. thanx jebus. [remember that simpsons episode -lol- "help me jebus...jebus!"] oh Homie :)


so ive decided im tired of the semester already. its not even close to midterm time. this isnt soo great. im tired of having to go to performances an visit museums. maybe jus cuz i dont like being told what to do. i unno. this little sculpture/cardboard thing i made is on display in the art atrium. looks shitty compared to the others. its been called a turtle or wall-e. ::sigh:: not how i envisioned it. now im about to build a giant water ripple out of fish pebble things that you put in the tank. fun... i have one class left that im about to role out for. effn art theory. its soo much bullshit that it angers me that i have to listen to it. i honestly dont kno wtf the point of the class is. it upsets me really. im dreading that exam. stupid.

ehh. ok. im done. least me n trevie are a-okz ♥

VH1's Best Weekend EVER!

as you all know [whether you love it or hate it] yesterday was Valentine's Day! at 12am on VDay, i gave trevor his gifts. his face was the sweetest. i was soo happy. he was like in total shock! it was a really good night. then we had a nice breakfast in the morning. then.. it was dinner time. he totz surprised me by takin me to La Chaumiere. its a cozy, rustic french restaurant in georgetown. fancy fancy.

the fanciest restaurant ive been to in my life.

mm... we had a cheese souffle. delicious. plates were cleaned. then we ordered the duck breast. yummy. black currants accompanied it. they are... tart. the veggies were good. but there was nothing to drink but water, wine and coffee. we drank water. but for water... it was tasty. service was quick as well. we were there for about an hour.

then it was time for dessert at home. it was nice. & delicious. wonderful evening. trevor is the best. i swear i love him soo much!

hope you all had nice vdays with lovers and/or friends lol. :)

chippin away.

i bite my nails when anxious. i used to be MUCH worse as a kid, but yea.. im a nail biter. its almost V-Day an im supremely excited. this year i get to spend the day of love with my Trevy Bear! yay :) he's so sweet. i just wonder where we're going to eat at and whats going to happen in general that day. im excited to give him his presents. i have soo much sneaking to do tomorrow (hooray for no friday classes!) this is going to be a very very good weekend. i think my heart is smiling. aww. im so lovey dovey. ♥

besides my heart spilling all over this blog... i ate catfish today. much tastier than the fish looks. also, its windy as hell for the last couple of days. i almost flew away a few times today as i carried some cardboard on campus to [art] class. i thought i might blow into the street and get hit by a passing bus. luckily the worst thing done was either basically being stopped in my tracks because i couldnt fight the wind or the wonderful zigzag pattern i was forced to walk in as the gusts pushed me back and forth. narrowly missing other passers by. glad my room is windfree.

im soo in for the night.

...and i missed jeopardy :( least trevor's on the way here.

who said i lied... cuz i never, never

stop me if you think that you've heard this one before. so, i just ordered a burger from jungle grille. im starrrvvving! ugh anyway. i gave in. i made one of those "25 randoms" notes on facebook like a couple hours ago. it was kinda funny making it, thinking of dumb ish about me that most people dont know. some were a little more obvious than others (like how i generally dont like pplz). some were obscure that i just realized at that instant.

in other news, gma sent me a card an monies for getting an A in my winter class. it pays to be smart [womp. i kno]lls. i always appreciates free money tho, def have to call her in the am to give her thxx for thinkin bout me :) grandparents are awesome. i wonder how much she'll send me for all As lol. sikeee, i wouldnt drain her cashflow. ugh, im really hungry. i need to drink sumthn so i can trick my stomach into believing it ate a light snack. too bad im a having a lazy spell at the moment.

& last thing. this makes me smile



dont you just love it when cartoonists get high an then make movies? i sure do.

wings; i like the part with 2 bones :)

mm, even if ur not enthused, you should know --> its Super Bowl SUNDAY! cardinals and steelers. hmm. how.. exciting? my vote goes for the cardinals, since they havent been to the big bowl before, they may never get back so they might as well win while they have the chance. i jus know that im happy as long as im enjoying wings while i gaze at the television (or projector screen.. depending on where i go)

wings+football+trevor=best day! im anxious. too bad i dont have a 40 to wash it down. darn it. ohhh wells i suppose. :\ maybe i can trick someone into getting it for me. an one for trevor despite his disgust for it. lls.

almost forgot the other bestest part: COMMERCIALS. mm imma have the giggles today :D lol